New Delhi [India], September 24: Emotional eating is often reduced to “lack of discipline” or “bad habits.” But behind it lies something more human, more tender. In this candid conversation, Health and Wellness Strategist Kathy O, founder of NuFit Wellness, shares her insights into the emotions that shape our relationship with food, and how softness, permission, and self-awareness can open the door to true healing.
1. In your view, what is the most misunderstood emotion hiding behind emotional eating — and how does it usually begin?
I believe any emotion could be hiding behind emotional eating — grief, sadness, anger, fear, shame, guilt. They’re often low-frequency emotions, what some call “negative,” yet each one carries a purpose. Anger tells us when our boundaries have been crossed. Grief lets us know something valuable has been lost. Guilt reminds us we haven’t met our own standards. Emotions are informants.
But when we don’t understand them, we turn to food to self-soothe, to cover the void, to bury fear. Emotional eating is often an attempt to create a temporary “high” or a false sense of safety. In my own life, I turned to food in moments of stress and sadness, only to realize much later that underneath it all, I was scared.
How does it begin? With a lack of awareness, emotional intelligence, and self-regulation skills. Most of us were never taught what healthy relating feels like, or how to process emotions. Food then becomes both comfort and distraction. Sometimes it’s even the result of “anchoring” — when sadness gets unknowingly paired with food, say through eating during a sad movie. Soon enough, every time we feel sad, our body seeks food. Awareness is always the first step toward change.
2. Many coaches prescribe discipline and meal plans, but what do they often overlook when supporting emotional eaters?
They overlook the emotion itself. Health professionals are often trained to give structure, routines, and nutrition guidelines — and those matter. But emotional eating is not about the food. It’s about what lies buried beneath.
When emotions are ignored, suppressed, or denied, they don’t disappear. They reappear in other forms. A client may lose weight with strict discipline, but if the underlying emotion is untouched, the pattern will resurface. Coaching emotional eaters requires going deeper — holding space for what has long been hidden.
3. Have you ever noticed that healing begins not with control, but with permission? What role does softness play in your coaching?
Yes, healing begins with permission to feel. My role is to create a safe, nurturing space where clients can slowly open the tap. We resist pain, avoid discomfort, suppress what feels foreign. By the time we reach adulthood, we’re often carrying an inner child full of bottled-up emotions.
Softness is what allows that child to finally land somewhere safe. Coaching, for me, is about validating, welcoming, and gently reminding clients: You were so young when you decided to carry this. You don’t have to keep carrying it alone.
4. If someone told you they’ve tried everything and nothing works, what is the first question you ask them — and why?
I ask: “Are you willing to try again, a different way?”
Often, people haven’t actually tried everything. They’ve tried restriction, control, or quick fixes — not liberation. My approach surprises them because it allows more, not less. Clients looking to lose weight often tell me: “I’m eating so much and still losing weight.” Those with gut issues find that addressing stress and emotions makes the biggest difference. Clients with thyroid concerns notice improvements when they work on sleep and sunlight.
But here’s the truth: lasting change takes commitment. If you don’t work on the emotions, the patterns will return. I make that clear from the beginning.
5. What do you wish more wellness professionals knew before taking on clients dealing with food-related trauma or emotional regulation?
That all behavior makes sense with enough information. A client is not their behaviors, not their thoughts, not even their emotions. They are a human being trying to interpret inputs and create healthy outputs.
Our role is not only to teach knowledge but to guide self-understanding. Sometimes that requires mentoring, sometimes deep coaching. Active listening is the bridge. And above all, this work is not just “health coaching” — it’s heartwork.
About Kathy O
Kathy O is a Health and Wellness Strategist and founder of NuFit Wellness. With a background in dietetics, she expanded her path into Breathwork and integrative practices, blending Eastern and Western medicine. Kathy helps people recognize that symptoms go beyond biology, guiding them toward awareness, conscious choices, and lasting change.
Her philosophy is simple yet profound: “Health, wealth, and thriving relationships are your birthright. Your body knows how to heal. Our job is to help it remember.”
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